10 questions you need to answer about your spouse

10 questions you need to answer about your spouse


Aaron & April Jacob

‘Tis the season for gratitude. ​

Here’s an idea for you – try keeping a little record full of the positive qualities you love, appreciate, and admire about your spouse.

Sound cheesy?

That’s because it is.

However, cheesy isn’t always bad. In fact, this simple exercise will produce amazing results in the way you feel about and view your spouse.

It may also be a good source of self-evaluation (How are YOU doing as a spouse?).

Start with these ten questions. They will help ignite within you a deep gratitude and love for your spouse and help you realize that your spouse really is your EVERYTHING.

How would your spouse answer these questions about you? Perhaps sit down together and answer these questions about each other, then share!

1.  What are your FIVE FAVORITE things about your spouse? (i.e. her twinkly eyes; his steadiness; her laugh; his genius brain power; her ability to keep it real)

2.  If there was a book written about your spouse, what kinds of examples would the chapter on CHARACTER include?

3.  What is your spouse’s temperament and disposition like, and what do you love most about it?

4.  What physical aspect of your spouse do you love the most?

5.  What, specifically, does your spouse do that makes you smile or laugh?

6.  In what ways does your spouse help you when you are having a bad day?

7.  What are five things your spouse is really good at doing?

8.  In what ways does your spouse support and encourage you?

9. What are some of the greatest things your spouse has accomplished?

10. What attributes and qualities about your spouse do you most admire?

Hopefully you find that this one simple act fills you with deeper love and gratitude for your spouse.

Did it? 

If you started to feel all the feels and to have a flood of happy memories come floating back, it’s because gratitude changes people. And it will change you.

You see, the amazing thing about this kind of exercise is that in remembering and focusing on positive things about your spouse you will find that you change, too.

Little things he/she does that bug you may not bug you as much. You will be more patient. More selfless. More thoughtful. 

After writing down your answers to the questions above, take time regularly to read through what you have written. Then, find a way to share those things with your spouse. Acknowledge often (and consistently) the hundreds of good things you see in him or her each day. This acknowledgement can come in many ways – words, notes, gifts, hugs, letters, expressions of affection, etc.. The trick is to be specific about the things you love and admire about your one-and-only.  

Tell him you appreciated that he put his toothbrush back in the cup last night. Tell her when she straightens her hair like that you think she looks drop-dead gorgeous. Thank him for filling the car up for you before your long drive to the airport. Hug him (and kiss him) while you tell him that the lawn looks amazing (or that he looks amazing). You get the picture. Simply let your spouse know how much you appreciate them for who they are and for who they are becoming.

So, go get a pen and paper and answer one of these 10 questions now. Then watch as gratitude works its magic in filling your heart with love. 


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