Our sex life is amazing but our marriage sucks

OUR SEX LIFE IS AMAZING BUT OUR MARRIAGE SUCKS

He woke up horny. He started touching his wife on her breasts.

He flipped her over. Got on top of her. He started kissing her, but she seemed not interested. He turned his game up, kissed her on her neck as he spread her legs. She looked away.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Us,” she said.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

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11 Big Signs of a Weak Man in a Relationship that May Surprise You

signs of a weak man in a relationship

11 BIG SIGNS OF A WEAK MAN IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT MAY SURPRISE YOU

Natasha Ivanovic

When we date, we always look for a strong man, but most of us don’t even know the signs of a weak man in a relationship, and why it actually matters.

Sadly, many women don’t know the signs of a weak man in a relationship. Now, this weakness I’m talking about is what makes a relationship one-sided. A weak man isn’t one who cries. In fact, he’s actually a strong man if he’s able to cry freely and express his emotions.

A truly weak man is someone that you carry through life. Rather than an equal relationship, you do all the dirty work while he’s just along for the ride. Though it may bring out your nurturing side, you’ll soon tire of it, trust me. Don’t stick around until he wears you down.

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The Great Pretender

Mom Newborn Baby Hospital

THE GREAT PRETENDER

Famifi

Fake it ‘til you make it takes on new meaning when you become a parent.

I first felt it on the day I headed down the hospital’s maternity corridor toward the newborns room: saturation-level imposter syndrome. In the two days prior, someone had always ceremoniously handed me my newborn while I lay below florescent lights on my sanitized throne of paper bed sheets surrounded by family. Members of this extended village were the ones supporting me, helping me feel like this new normal—this new role—was, in fact, real.

But at last I felt up to getting around the hallways on foot, now able to make my way toward this curious creature and claim him myself. So, I wielded a plastic wristband with my name on it, a flimsy passport that somehow convinced the baby warden to hand over this squirrely little person.

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R is for Repair

R IS FOR REPAIR

Zach Brittle

Repair is easily my favorite concept in the entire Gottman encyclopedia. Typically, we think of repair in terms of what we have to do to a car or a washing machine or a botched haircut. As in, it’s broken, it needs repair. But in relational terms, repair is less about fixing what is broken and more about getting back on track.

What is a repair attempt?

Masters of relationships repair early and often. And they have lots of strategies for how to repair. Gottman describes a repair attempt as “any statement or action — silly or otherwise — that prevents negativity from escalating out of control.” The reason I love the concept so much is because of that word “any.” It leaves a ton of room for creativity. And because every relationship is different, finding the repair strategies that work for you can actually be a unique game that belongs to just the two of you.

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A is for Arguments

A IS FOR ARGUMENTS

Zach Brittle

Just for kicks, I decided to ask Google for help finding marriage and relationship words that started with “A.” I got a lot of help with my Scrabble game, but not too much else. I did find one site dedicated to “marriage vocabulary.” The list of “A” words included: Acceptance, Admiration, Affection, Affinity, Allegiance, Appreciation, Approval, and Attentive.

All of those words are relevant and essential to healthy relationship. They’re good words. And I think that you should accept and admire and all those other things with your partner, but I also think you should argue. Maybe it’s just me, but I think if you’re not arguing, you’re probably not committed.

When engaged couples come into my office for pre-marital counseling, one of my first questions is, “Could you tell me about when/how/why you argue?”

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P is for Problems

Image result for picture of parking sign

P IS FOR PROBLEMS

Zach Brittle

John Gottman’s research revealed that about ⅔ of relationship problems are unsolvable. One of my favorite questions for couples is whether that statistic is discouraging or encouraging. Think about that for a second. Does the idea that 69% of your issues are not going away bum you out? Or does it give you hope?

Most couples I know are frustrated by the fact that most of their problems are unsolvable. It’s hard to have the same battles over and over again. My personal bias, however, is that I’m glad to know that we’re normal. My wife and I spent way too much time arguing over the fact that we were having the same fight that we ultimately forgot what we were fighting about in the first place.

Dr. Gottman has said that the number one thing that couples fight about is nothing. I can vouch for this. This past weekend, my wife and I got into an argument over fruit flies. It was really stupid. Later, when our older daughter (age 11) was explaining the argument to her sister (age 7), she said, “It’s never about the fruit flies.” Indeed. What’s it about then?

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The Real Cost of Divorce

THE REAL COST OF DIVORCE

Seouser

Marriage can be difficult. Sometimes you may feel like you’re at your wits end and the relationship can’t be saved.

But are you aware of the real costs of getting divorce. It’s far beyond just money.

Check out the infographic we put together below about different stats related to divorce in Canada and the United States. If you’d like to share on your blog/website, copy the embed code near the bottom of this page.

You’ll notice from the stats and figures presented below that it’s important partners experiencing a rough patch – no matter how tough it may seem – at least try marriage and couples counselling. It can save a lot. And it’s highly effective.

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Being Brave Together

Fear

BEING BRAVE TOGETHER

Famifi

We all want fearless kids, right? Little people who can jump off high dives, check under their own beds for monsters, and brave their way through Halloween night. So how do we help them build up the resilience they’re going to need to do just that?

Developing our kids’ internal compass

Kara Fic leans on lessons learned from her own childhood as she now raises two daughters, one of whom was recently heading out the door on her first solo commute to a school across town. Kara says she slipped her camping compass into the 11-year-old’s hand as she ventured out: “She’s ready for this new challenge,” says Kara, “but it’s still a big city. The compass is really just there as a backup in case she gets disoriented—and as a reminder that she’s navigated denser forests than this.”

Kara refers to the many campouts her family has taken together over the years when her daughters were first earning their stripes as Girl Scouts—and teaching the boys a thing or two about bravery in the process. Bears, bees, rain and rations toughened up the girls, Kara explains, as they did during her own Girl Scout days. She’s happy about how her daughters’ wilderness training now spills over into their city life—and into their fear management in general.

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8 Positive Ways to Deal with Rejection in Any Scenario

ways to deal with rejection

8 POSITIVE WAYS TO DEAL WITH REJECTION IN ANY SCENARIO

Team LovePanky

No one wants to face rejection, but we must learn to handle it. Whether it’s from your job, your partner, or someone else, here’s how to get by.

Rejection is a hard pill to swallow. You start off by working your butt off to achieve something, whether it’s a date with someone, a job, or a promotion. Then, for some reason, you get turned down. Sometimes the way you get turned down is downright harsh and ego-shattering, but there are also times when you’re given a little encouragement to try again, or work just a little bit harder.

How to handle being rejected

In the end, you still need to be able to move on from getting rejected. Yes, we know it’s easier said than done. But to help you through this tough time, we’ve got some tips for how you can deal with rejection.

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11 Tips to Fall in Love with Yourself and be a Better YOU

fall in love with yourself

11 TIPS TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF AND BE A BETTER YOU

Team LovePanky

Do you ever feel like you’re not happy being who you are? At times, feeling lonely and all alone may be a reflection of how you feel on the inside. Find out how to love yourself, have better relationships and a better life.

In life, there are times when we feel like a failure.

But that’s no reason to hate yourself or think you’re no good.

Understanding how to love yourself can help you cope with failure and rebuild your confidence, and enjoy a better life.

There may be many reasons behind why you don’t love yourself, all the way from being overweight to not getting attention from others to repeated failures.

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