TEN THINGS TO TEACH YOUR SON ABOUT TRUE MANHOOD
By John Grant
Ten Things to Teach your Son about True Manhood:
Being a gentleman is still worth the effort:
- Hold the door.
- Stand up when a woman leaves or joins the table.
- Walk on the “splash” side of the sidewalk.
- Attempt (gently) to pick up the tab.
- Go get the car when it’s raining.
- Offer your hand
At the same time, be respectful: All the above “gentlemanly” actions must be offered subtly, and – if necessary – set aside graciously when refused.
Take responsibility: In a word (well, two), “step up.” True manhood takes responsibility for its actions, choices, values and beliefs. And while taking responsibility, manhood is also willing to admit with grace when it is wrong.
Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable: Real strength allows other people in. Manhood is honest about feelings and not afraid to be known. True manhood never builds a wall where there should be a window or a fortress where there should be a sanctuary.
Actually being a man is more important than talking like one: Real men don’t just stand up and speak up, they put up too. Loud talk and tough posturing don’t cut it. True manhood involves finding a need and doing something about it. Real men don’t complain about social problems, they go out and do something about them. Real men don’t point fingers, they work for solutions. Real men get calluses on their hands.
Listen respectfully, disagree politely, and never exclude women from conversations: True manhood is inclusive. It may be strong, but it’s unfailingly polite. Men who equate bluster or machismo with strength are typically covering something up. Men who think women have nothing to contribute to the conversation need to wake up and smell the 21st century.
Love is stronger than muscles: True manhood understands that brute force is less compelling than self-giving love. The best solutions to difficulties involved applied love.
The first shall be last: True manhood puts others first. Jesus is quoted more than once as saying something like this: If you want to be a leader, then the place to be is on your knees, with a towel in your hand, washing someone’s feet.
Manhood is sometimes more about what you could do but didn’t than what you could have avoided but did anyway: There’s a lot of restraint a great deal of “Quiet Strength” in true manhood. Real men tend to always have something in reserve.
True manhood is more about giving than about getting: Our culture often touts a men-see-what-they-want-then-they-go-out-and-get-it view of manhood. But true manhood is more along the lines of seeing what the world needs and doing it – strength leveraged for the benefit of others.
God’s Holy Spirit enables you to be the kind of man God wants you to be. To begin walking in the power of the Holy Spirit, you can open your heart and life to Him right now by praying this prayer with sincerity:
Dear Father, I need You. I acknowledge that I have been directing my own life and that, as a result, I have sinned against You. I thank You that You have forgiven my sins through Christ’s death on the cross for me. I now invite Christ to again take His place on the throne of my life. Fill me with the Holy Spirit as You commanded me to be filled, and as You promised in Your Word that You would do if I asked in faith. I now thank You for directing my life and for filling me with the Holy Spirit.”