IF YOU STOPPED BELIEVING IN LOVE, READ THIS ESSAY NOW
Have you endured a lot of heartbreak, and now you’ve stopped believing in love? I’m here to give you the courage and insights you need to trust love one more time. Read on…
It’s always fascinating to me the responses I receive when I tell women that if they want to break their Prince Harming patterns, then they must stop overly prioritizing finding a man who is sexy and successful.
They must ALSO prioritize finding a man who:
- values growing
- revels in open, honest communication
- displays 20/20 listening skills
- shows a Gumby-like flexibility for compromise
Often women wind up laughing heartily at my description of this evolved kind of man.
They insist this type of man does not exist!
“You’re a female chauvinist!” I’ve called these women.
I then further explain to these women how prejudiced they are being – because they cannot believe it’s possible for men to be emotionally evolved.
It’s no wonder these women have stopped believing in love!
How can they believe in love – when they have stopped believing there are men out there who are capable of communicating honestly and deeply from their hearts?
“You’re basically saying that all men are emotional bimbos,” I tell these women.
Usually the combo of the words “female chauvinist” and “emotional bimbo” shock these women into a fuller awareness of how gender-prejudiced they’re being.
I tell these women that they must stop being “negative evidence collectors,” seeking proof that all men are “emotional bimbos.”
Plus I warn these women about how they can accidentally encourage a self-fulfilling prophecy of bad behavior from their man – if they treat a good man to their bad attitude toward him.
I instruct these women to become “positive evidence collectors.”
Their assignment: They must mindfully start to look for proof of the plentiful, wonderful Prince Charming–esque guys who are out there.
- These good men could be married to or dating their lucky girlfriends.
- Or they could be written up in the news.
- Maybe they are working alongside them at their offices.
- Plus they could even be in the very bed with them – right beside them!
I warn women against using the words “always” and “never” – in either reference to their love life or men as a category.
- “I will never find a man who values growing.”
- “I always meet guys who cheat.”
Any time you create a sentence with an “always” and/or “never” you set yourself up with a limiting belief that can create a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom and gloom.
Basically when you use “always” and/or “never” in a sentence, you put yourself in a hopeless, depressed frame of mind.
Whenever I’m with someone who says they’re depressed, I assign them to jackhammer-drill down to find and dump their pesky “always” and/or “never.”
Usually one of these two words is at the root of their depression – draining them of faith and vitality.
The words “Always” and “Never” are liars.
They whisper mean beliefs into your subconscious and conscious mind, about how you will forever be unable to change your situation.
Psychologists call these beliefs “permanent” and “pervasive.”
They are wildly dangerous to your spirit and your potential for a happily ever after destiny.
The truth is:
It’s very rare that there’s a “never” or an “always” in someone’s life.
Have you stopped believing in love?
- If so, try to locate your “always” and “never” limiting beliefs.
- Try to understand the root of these beliefs. Do they come from your childhood and/or a series of bad experiences?
- Next, be willing to unblock these limiting beliefs. Be open to the possibility that you can find a good partner – someone who truly has lots of emotionally evolved qualities!
- This brings us to lawyer time. Pretend you’re a lawyer! Find proof that your “always” and “never” are liars!
- Finally – get yourself to fully accept that good partners are very much walking around on this planet! Once you believe in the existence of these good quality people – you will be more likely to find them!!
It’s amazing how powerful changing your belief system can be. When you change the way you look at men and love, you wind up changing what you notice and find.