5 Regretful Lies and Excuses Your Mind Likes to Tell You

5 REGRETFUL LIES AND EXCUSES YOUR MIND LIKES TO TELL YOU

Angel Chernoff

The mind is a wonderful thing.  It’s also a liar and an excuse machine that frequently tries to convince us not to take actions we know are good for us.  This ultimately prevents many positive changes from taking place in our lives.

I’ve had to learn to watch these lies and excuses very carefully in order to make the positive changes I’ve made in my life: a healthier diet, regular exercise, meditation, more sleep, daily writing, better planning, less procrastination, more focus, etc.

If I hadn’t learned about these lies and excuses, and how to suppress them, I would never have succeeded in making these positive changes.  In fact, until I knew better, I had failed countless times when I was young because my mind’s deceptive tendencies used to get the best of me.

So why does the mind lie to us and make irrational excuses?

Because the mind wants comfort – that’s why.  It’s afraid of discomfort, pressure and change.  The mind is used to its comfort zone, and anytime we try to stretch that zone too far, for too long, the mind tries desperately to get back to ground zero at any cost… including sacrificing our long-term health, happiness and success.

So let’s expose five of the cowardly mind’s most regretful lies and excuses once and for all – Marc and I have literally seen these specific lies and excuses plaguing hundreds of our course students over the past decade:

1.  “I can’t do it.” – It seems too difficult at first, so you think you can’t stick to the positive change you’re making.  You subconsciously don’t believe in yourself enough to take another step.  This is a common lie/excuse that can be countered by looking at the fact that other people no more capable than you have done it.  For example, my 60-year-old next-door neighbor ran a marathon a little before I started training for my first half-marathon, and so I told myself, “If she can do it, so can I!”  And I was right.  Truth be told, the only person who can tell you “I can’t” is you.  If you hear those words echoing in the back of your mind, tune them out.  In the end, your doubts and your faith have something in common.  They both ask you to believe in something you can’t see; you simply have to decide which one you want to believe.

2.  “They can do it, but that doesn’t apply to me because they have it better than me.” – Just because someone else can, doesn’t mean you can, right?  You look for reasons they can do it but you can’t – maybe he’s an internet entrepreneur or freelance writer because he has no kids.  Maybe she’s way fitter than I am, so she can run a marathon.  Maybe she doesn’t have all the work and family obligations I have, or has a supportive spouse, or doesn’t have bad knees.  OK, fine, it’s easy to find excuses: but look at all the other people who have considerable obstacles too who’ve done it.  Marc and I have a family, and have dealt with significant loss in our lives, and still managed to succeed on many fronts.  And just as we’ve turned things around for ourselves, we know hundreds of other people who’ve done the same.  Through a decade of life coaching, we’ve witnessed people reinventing themselves at all ages – 48-year olds starting families, 57-year-olds graduating from college for the first time, 71-year-olds starting successful businesses, and so forth.  And stories abound of people with disabilities or illnesses who overcame their obstacles to achieve great things.  Your obstacles can be overcome.

3.  “It’ll be too hard because I can’t get by without _______.” – Fill in the blank: I need my wine, my cheese, my sweets, my TV shows, my nine hours of sleep, my big house, my fancy wardrobe, etc.  These are luxuries we convince ourselves we can’t live without, so we can justify not making positive changes like eating healthier or exercising daily or saving money or simplifying our lives or building a profitable side hustle.  And like I said, I’m not immune either – in the past I’ve made these excuses myself, but they all turned out to be lies.  I didn’t need any of these things in my life, and believing that I did was only getting in the way of the positive changes I was capable of creating for myself.  (covered in the “Letting Go of What’s No Longer Serving You” lesson of “Getting Back to Happy”)

4.  “Life is meant to be easier and enjoyed more.” – Sure, I agree that life should be enjoyed (as many of us do) but the problem is that the idea that life should ALWAYS be easy and enjoyable is used to justify all kinds of lazy behavior.  Might as well sit on the couch and scarf down those Twinkies, because hey, life is meant to be enjoyed, right?  Nope.  You can do without junk food and still enjoy life.  You can exercise and enjoy it.  You can give up a lot of comfort in your life and not lose a thing.  In fact, the path of least resistance is often the path of least reward.  You need to do hard things.  There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.  As Einstein once said, “Genius is 1% talent and 99% hard work.”  You must run to be a runner.  You must write to be a writer.  You must actively work on a business venture to learn how to run a successful business.  There is no substitute for doing the work.  So meditate on this every day: “I will do the work.  It won’t be easy.  It will be worth it!”  (covered in the “Increasing Your Willpower” lesson of “Getting Back to Happy”)

5.  “I can do it later.” – Sure, you can always do it later… but your later self will feel the same exact way.  Think about it: Why should your later self be more disciplined than your present self?  In fact, because you’re allowing yourself to slack off now, you’re building a habit of procrastination and actually making it less likely that your later self will be more disciplined.  So today, stop making excuses for why you can’t get it done and start focusing on all the reasons why you must make it happen.  Stop talking about what you have done or what you are going to do.  Just do it and let your actions speak for themselves.  Most great things in life don’t happen by chance, they happen by choice.  You never know what’s possible until you risk finding out.  In the end, there is only one thing that makes your dreams and goals completely impossible to achieve:  Your lack of action today.

And of course, if you’re struggling with any of this, know that you are not alone. Many of us are right there with you, working hard to feel better, think more clearly, and get our lives back on track.

administrator

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

SUBSCRIBE

You have successfully subscribed to the newsletter

There was an error while trying to send your request. Please try again.

Combat Domestic Violence and Abuse will use the information you provide on this form to be in touch with you and to provide updates and marketing.