WHY I NEVER TALKED ABOUT MY ABUSIVE ARRANGED MARRIAGE
Why did she, and millions of other women remain in abusive marriages? How can she put it behind her?
Recently, I spent a whole night watching YouTube interviews of victims who have suffered/are suffering from domestic violence. At that time I didn’t know why I was doing what I was doing. But I wanted to hear those who’ve had similar lives to mine.
They’ve all suffered to different degrees and at different stages in their relationship. They all had different but equally painful stories to share. At the end of each conversation, the host of the show asks them, “Why would you allow all those wrong things to happen to you? Why didn’t you seek any help?” Most of them didn’t even share their sufferings with anybody. The host asks if they were too ashamed of what happened or of themselves, or was it because they feel no one would understand them? They all replied differently, but none of them knew precisely why.
HAVE I LOST MY WIFE TO ANOTHER MAN?
Dave and Clara have been married for over nine years without children. They stayed with each other and hoped that they would have a child before their 10th anniversary because they were being persuaded by family and some friends to get a divorce but they couldn’t let go because of the love they shared.
Months passed by and, while Dave was returning from work one day, he saw his wife walking down the road with a man, and they looked quite happy.
Another evening, while Dave was coming back from work, he saw the same man drop her off at the house. Dave became sad and angry.
A Message on Domestic Violence by a Former Victim Mary Gilliam
DAISY MY DAUGHTER
Please read and understand that domestic violence must be exposed and stopped!
Daisy was born beautiful. Her mother received her with misty eyes. She felt so proud. After three boys, Manny was beginning to doubt his ability to make a female baby. And now along came Daisy from his loins. He’s a complete man, after all. Right?
There was so much to eat and drink at the naming ceremony of Daisy. She got a name from every member of the family. Quite a list but the one other name that stuck was the one her paternal grandmother gave her, Gift.
How does one approach this kind of premeditated murder attempt? I thought there was a limit to domestic violence. Hasn’t this crossed the boundary?
IF ONE OF THESE 16 TWEETS DESCRIBES YOUR RELATIONSHIP, GET HELP IMMEDIATELY
Do you feel loved? It’s normal to have disagreements with your spouse, but are those fights filled with belittling, guilt tripping and manipulating?
Does your spouse make you feel like no one else would want to be around you because you are ugly or obnoxious?
If so, there is something you need to understand immediately: you are so worth loving.
You might not feel that now, but in time, you can.
Even if he doesn’t hit you, your husband (or wife) can still be abusive.
When writer Zahira Kelly opened a conversation about how utterly destructive emotional abuse is, Twitter exploded with support and insight into the life of those who deal with emotional abuse every day.
Although abusive men in heterosexual relationships were the target of most of these tweets, abuse can happen to anyone. If any of these apply to you, get help immediately.
FORGIVENESS VS. RECONCILIATION
“Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”
(Romans 12:17-18, NASB)
Following a series of Daily Encounters on “Forgiveness,” a number of readers wanted to know if forgiving another person meant that we have to forget what has happened; or to love and stay with them if they are abusive; or to trust them?
The answer is no, no, no! Let me explain further.
When we have sinned, we need to be reconciled to God, (2 Corinthians 5:20, NIV) but while reconciliation with others is the ideal, it isn’t always possible—and sometimes not to be desired. Some teachers argue that forgiveness isn’t possible unless the offending person admits what she/he has done and asks for forgiveness of the one they have hurt. If this were true, many of us would be stuck for life for the fact that many people do not, or will not, admit that they have done anything wrong, let alone apologize for it.
THE PSYCHOLOGY OF ANGER
A professor asked his students, “Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?”
The students thought for a while. One said, “Because we lose our calm.”
The professor asked again, “Why shout when the other person is just next to you? Isn’t it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you are angry?”
The students gave some answers but none satisfied the professor.