CONNECTING WITH YOUR PAIN COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE
Charlie was in my office yesterday. He was all smiles. I commended him on the quick transformation he had made in his relationship with his wife, Melinda. Even though his job had been extremely stressful lately, and he was experiencing a flare-up of symptoms from a chronic illness, he was content and hopeful. Melinda and their two children, James and Alissa, were doing well and settling into the back-to-school routines of basketball practice and music lessons.
“It seems like a long time ago,” Charlie said, referring to his suicide attempt two years earlier. We had just spent a long time processing something he’d once been reluctant to talk about. It was his second close brush with taking his own life.
The numbness and depression that had been his familiar companions through adolescence and young adulthood, layered with the lack of parental nurture and constant emotional chaos from his parents’ fighting, had left him with few internal emotional resources. He was familiar with a hollow ache inside that could not seem to be filled. He’d had no modeling in his life about how to really notice his feelings or interpret what they meant, so he was not in touch with his true and legitimate needs for loving connection, validation, security, and support.
INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE AND THE #METOO MOVEMENT
Mary Beth George
Trigger warning: This article discusses sexual assault and violence.
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Over the years, the term domestic violence has been broadened to the more accurate term, intimate partner violence, acknowledging that abuse can occur regardless of marital status, gender, or sexual orientation.
When you hear the term domestic or intimate partner violence, you probably imagine a woman with a black eye, fleeing in the middle of the night to escape her batterer. While that image is accurate, it does not capture the depth and breadth of what many women experience. It also does not bring into focus the batterer.
I should mention that while the majority of domestic violence victims are women, abuse of men happens far more often than you might expect. Data from the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey indicates that one in six men in the United States have experienced some form of contact sexual violence during their lifetime, and 11% of men have experienced contact sexual violence, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner.
THE LION INSIDE A MAN DOES NOT EAT WOMEN
At one time a newly married young man was shouting at his 20-year-old wife. His father called him inside and said to him, “We only shout at people our threats can give fear but not the same to a woman especially the one you call your wife. The way you are shouting, you are giving away your power and she is the one you are giving it to. Your threats make her stronger.”
Most men believe that a woman is subdued when she is being threatened, but that’s a lie. Nothing is further from the truth!
Let us not be blind and still feel we have our eyes wide open. Why is it that the moment a man starts having sex, even with a 15-year-old little girl, his partner stops fearing him? If she was used to running away to hide when she saw him before then, that would stop. I will tell you something about women we have never believed.
21 BIG SIGNS OF EMOTIONAL ABUSE YOU MAY BE OVERLOOKING
Emotional abuse is extremely easy to overlook. Just take a look at these 21 signs of emotional abuse to see if you’re being abused instead of loved!
As humans, we’re not dumb. When someone opposes or oppresses us with emotional abuse, we’re always ready to strike back.
But what do you do when you’re manipulated just a little bit every day?
What do you do if you just don’t realize you’re being tricked and duped into abuse with sweet words of love?
What if your love for this person convinces you that you need to bend over backwards just to please them, even if that translates to emotional abuse?
AM I IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP? 17 SURE SIGNS!
Are you being abused without even realizing it? Use these self-reflecting signs to find the answer to your question, ‘Am I in an abusive relationship?’
You love your partner.
And your partner loves you.
And the world’s a beautiful place.
But what do you do when abuse finds a way to seep into your romance?
Of course, as humans, we won’t be sitting ducks just waiting to be abused by someone else.
HOW TO RESPECT WOMEN: WE’RE SO GLAD YOU WANT TO KNOW THIS TODAY
If you are wondering how to respect women, you are taking a step in the right direction. The fact that you’re worried about this at all is refreshing.
Learning how to respect women is not all that complicated. By following the golden rule, treat others how you want to be treated, you should be okay.
But I am also aware of how our patriarchal society has conditioned all men and even women to disrespect women for our bodies, minds, and more. So there may be times that you think you are being perfectly respectful but are in fact falling flat.
Please every parent and guardian should teach their children and wards, especially toddlers, very early about ‘PANTS’ rules. Times have changed and the world has become a very sick and pathetic place to live. There are many paedophiles and rapists out there. Be careful, and note that everyone is a suspect here.
We must prayerfully protect our children by arming them with the right information:
P – Private parts are private. Nobody is permitted to touch them.
A – Always remember that your body is yours and yours only.
5 THINGS MEN SAY TO AN ANGRY WOMAN THAT MAKE HER ANGRIER
Don’t say you were never told.
It can take a lot to get a woman angry but when you do get her angry, it’s wise to carefully think about the next words that will be coming out of your mouth.
Since every woman will respond differently to what their man says when they are angry, maybe learning what not to say can help when in such a situation.
WIN RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT BY LETTING YOUR PARTNER WIN TOO
Good relationships are built on the belief of what’s good for you is good for me too. Partners realize that the best bet is to work together, rather than against each other.
Meet Jordan and Taylor, a couple in their mid-forties.
They’ve been having issues with housework. Jordan is exhausted from nagging Taylor about leaving dirty clothes on the floor and not vacuuming the house. Jordan feels Taylor doesn’t listen, and feels that Taylor’s unwillingness demonstrates a lack of caring. Taylor, on the other hand, feels that Jordan is demanding and unloving. If Jordan truly cared, Taylor would get some slack on when the housework gets done.