The Value Dating Economy

THE VALUE DATING ECONOMY

Kyle Benson

It’s Easter. You’re in the grocery store, and you can’t stop staring at the blonde girl buying flowers. You feel a pull towards her. She’s beautiful.

You’re obsessively strategizing ways to introduce yourself. When we become attracted to someone, we don’t necessarily choose who it is:  there’s never a logical reason behind it.. Attraction and love is a complicated process. I remember meeting this beautiful blond who modeled for Cover Girl, but the moment our hands touched, I felt revolted by her man hands. She was an amazing person, but for some odd reason this was something I just couldn’t get over.

Let’s explore how the process happens.

Miguel and Maria are at a wedding of a mutual friend. As they approach each other, there’s tension building between them. From the second they noticed each other; the two enter into a nonstop exchange of information.

This reduces uncertainty, and it weighs the value that each person offers the other. Miguel and Maria were making judgments and assumptions about one another before the first word was even spoken.

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There is something about Miguel’s well-groomed hair, strong physique and neatly trimmed facial hair that Maria finds unique. Maria’s soft voice and green eyes excite Miguel. As they begin to play verbal ping-pong, they can sense the excitement and energy of something more than just a conversation.

They find similarities in each other’s personalities, which increases their chemistry and connection. This develops positive feedback loops as they to continue to get to know each other.

As Miguel talks about his life growing up in Puerto Rico and his childish tendencies of stuffing food in his mouth like a chipmunk, it makes Maria smile. As he explains that he saves the storage for later, she giggles and lightly hits him on the shoulder. As soon as she does this, the distance between them decreases unconsciously. It continues to shrink until they both give in to the urge to kiss.

What’s happening here?

What causes Miguel to get so excited about Maria, rather than his best friend Kelly? She’s similar to Maria. They’re both attractive Latina women with green eyes? What is it about Miguel that turns on Maria more than her friend John, who is well-groomed and in good shape, just like Miguel?

When you meet someone, your mind immediately seeks to remove uncertainty… Are they a psychopathic killer? Is she going to try to use me, or try to make me do something I don’t want to do? Do they like me? Will I like them? 

Your unconscious is forming an assessment based on countless factors. Their physical attractiveness, fashion style, ethnicity, accent, body language, their emotional energy, and the content of the words coming from their lips. You’re assessing whether those words match the intentions you’ve already assumed about them.

At some point, we began to move past a place of uncertainty. We start to ask ourselves new questions that predict the value of our future relationship. 1 Is this someone I want to keep as a friend, someone I just want to sleep with, or someone I want to seriously date? All of these evaluations are happening simultaneously as the verbal and nonverbal conversation continues.

Anyone else’s behavior is filtered through your mind by your own perceptions, feelings, and thoughts. The Cover Girl model may have a husband that loves her hands, because his mother’s hands were rough and calloused from working hard at the local mill when he was young. Meanwhile, I find them disgusting and discomforting.

In its simplest form, human interactions can be reduced to value feedback: a nonstop loop of expressing, receiving and interpreting of verbal and nonverbal.

When you talk to an attractive girl and she doesn’t reply, you receive negative feedback. You might interpret that reaction as she’s being rude. You might interpret that she’s hard of hearing. Or you might interpret it that she’s attracted to you, but she’s playing hard-to-get.

You expressed yourself by talking, but you received nothing from her in the conversation. This makes it feel like a one-sided conversation, and your brain interprets the experience. What your brain interprets out of her response is crucial to what happens next.

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When the feedback loop is positive and to our liking, we find the person attractive. More compelling. Your attraction to each other is dependent on the appraisal method we use to value ourselves and others. It’s in this sense that we attract what we are.

Everything in life has a value, and just like happiness,  our value differs from anyone else. It’s based on the quality of experience we have or desire to have throughout our life. Maybe you value religion more than money or physical attractiveness more than intelligence. and so on. To make this process a little more simple, I am going to take a few exemplary items of what may make someone attractive, and provide a value that will total 100.

24-year-old Kelly unconsciously values the following things:

Religion = 4

Socio-economic status = 25

Attractiveness = 37

Age = 5

Political ideology = 1

Intelligence = 6

Hobbies = 2

Partying = 12

I’ve purposely skewed Kelly’s values to demonstrate how demographics play into attractiveness. Obviously, Kelly is a wild child. She cares deeply about superficial values, such as wealth and attractiveness, over intelligence, hobbies or age.

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She’d be perfectly happy to date a club owner who is  in his mid-thirties. She wouldn’t care if his life didn’t contain much outside of partying. People tend to place a higher value  on things which either makes them feel better or compliment and advance their own perceived value.

 Kelly’s best bet to meet someone would be to spend a majority of her time going to nightclubs, rather than attending a meditation retreat. This validates the point of this demographics. Our matching of similar values are contextually driven and contextually matched.

Some may even consider Kelly a stereotypical gold digger . Such women tend to come from poverty. She’s contextually driven, which means she values money more than anything else, and she will seek out a man that is very wealthy because she believes that money makes her life valuable, which contextually matches her values. Not that this is true every time; a woman can also be a ‘gold digger’ if she’s from a very wealthy family, and was raised to believe money was important.

Every single one of us have a unique value system to account for our unique preferences. It’s much more than your political beliefs or your cultural preferences. It’s a contact super glued to your eyeball that filters, sorts and processes all of the information you receive. Once this information is received, it is assigned a value.

Playing soccer has a specific value to me.

Watching Dexter and eating ice cream has a high value to a girl I know

Shooting guns has a specific value to another friend of mine.

Our value is derived from our biological programming, our own preferences (if we choose them), and socialization that is relative to our specific cultures. I like to think of matching values as a car key. The feedback is the key; the unique shape is the value. Whether it starts the car is dependent on whether the key matches the keyhole.

So ask yourself, right now: what are your values?

If I were to use the same listed values as Kelly, my list would be:

Religion =3

Socio-economic Status = 6

Attractiveness = 16

Age = 7

Political Ideology = 9

 Intelligence = 30

Hobbies = 20

Partying = 9

It’s clear that I value knowledge and intelligence, because I love a mentally stimulating conversation. I feel more emotionally connected to a person who is going to challenge or broaden my views of the world.

Understanding your own values will enable you to consciously select environments, and meet women who share those same values. Those are the types of relationships we want. We want them with women that have similar values, because those are the women who will make you happy. That’s what relationships should be about. Not the number of times you’ve gotten laid.

  1. Sunnafrank, Michael. “Predicted Outcome Value In Initial Conversations.” Communication Research Reports 5.2 (1988): 169-172. 

How to Understand and Save your Marriage

HOW TO UNDERSTAND AND SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE

Sheqoz


Marriage is a ground for building long term true love

Love Bonds Two as One:

The need to be loved is a primary emotional need for all mankind. A trigger for an invitation to share love on long-term basis. This desire is a phenomenon that follows us from childhood. If you remember your child hood memories, nothing made you happier than your parents love.

As an adult, when you found someone to reciprocate this feeling, it fulfilled your desire to be loved. Marriage presents the opportunity to share love on a deeper level for a long time. Love is free and it does not come with conditions or stipulations, it radiates independently like the sun.

Yearning for Love in Marriage:


It is important to acknowledge each other in marriage

The need to feel loved by your spouse is at the heart of marital desires. Married couples should understand this. In today’s society, we often find ourselves neglecting each other’s feelings in search of material possession which are no replacement for human emotional love.

If you think of a two-sided weighing scale; both weight must be equal for it to balance. Marriage is the same, it takes both spouses to balance things out. There must be consistent deposits into the love account by both partners.

The Beginning of Marital Problems:

The distraction from daily hassles has wrecked many marriages as it Creates emotional distancing. For example; a husband who spends all his time chasing material possession has no time to connect with his wife. In return, she feels ignored and starts drifting away emotionally, which leads to a lonely wife syndrome.

When and if her husband desires her, she turns him down because she feels ignored until desired. She has valid reasons but since they’re unspoken, her husband too turns into a victim of undesired. A contributing factor for most infidelities. Both couples are more than likely to seek emotional fulfillment outside of their marriage.

Attention Seeking in Marriage is Normal:


Marriage is a give and take

When marital problems begin to surface. Couples might start feeling burdened by each other. For this reason, they may start giving each other the cold treatment. I have friends confess to not having spoken to their husbands for weeks. You see, nature cries out to be loved by another; which makes isolation devastating to the human psyche.

The very reason solitary confinement is one of the cruelest punishment. Everyone desires to be intimate and to be loved by someone and marriage is ground to fulfill these purpose. It is not meant to be an isolation chamber. Therefore it is ok for a woman to seek her husband’s attention and vice versa. Couples who acknowledge each other stay together.

Understanding your Commitment:

When you got married, you entered into an intimate union. Living any differently can make love elusive. Something that changes both your feelings from how they were in the beginning of things. This is why you often hear people complaining that their spouse changed.

Married couples should avoid cold treatment at all costs. Emotional separation triggers arguments, disrespectful words and even hate. This doesn’t mean that there was no love in the first place, it simply means the inner person became emotionally empty. How does this happen?

Let’s think of an automobile, when gas tank is full, you can drive longer distances. If the tank is empty, the engine won’t run as intended. The same is true with love, you must refill your partner’s emotional desires constantly.

When emotional feelings are left unattended because of the busy life schedules. They sadly dry up, as a result; husbands complain that their wives don’t love them anymore and vice versa. Remember the fire you both had in the beginning? It cannot continue burning if there’s nothing to fuel it.


Marriage is ground for lifetime love and happiness

The Grass is Never Greener on the Other Side.

Marriage is like a silver trophy award which you received for maintaining the flames. You earned it through consistency. Unfortunately most couples get too comfortable and place the trophy on the shelves. Once the silver gets tarnished, they toss it into the garbage for a replacement.

The very reason for three, four and even five failed marriages. They don’t realize the same old mistake will tarnish the new trophy as well. What I’m l trying to say? Taking old habits into a new relationship will end things in the same direction as the previous one.

One must have clear understanding of marriage fundamentals and patience to build stability. I also strongly believe in God’s intentions for marriage. A man was declared the head of a home and so shall it be. Wise women build their homes while wise men put strong foundations.

It is easier to work on a familiar situation than walk into the unknown. If you have been considering separation, pull your tarnished silver from the shelves and give it a good polish. Separation should be a last option. Things don’t just get rocky in marriage. Couples get too comfortable and neglect their roles.

Unless you are in a violent relationship, get to the bottom of the problem and start working on each other with great respect and kindness towards one another. If there’s violence involved, please walk out before it’s too late and seek professional help. Good luck in your relationship.

How to Make Him Miss You and Call You More

HOW TO MAKE HIM MISS YOU AND CALL YOU MORE

Team Lovepanky

Ever wondered how to make him miss you more often, or make him call you more? Here are all the tips and sneaky tricks you’d need to make your man miss you more, and desire you all the time.

Knowing how to make him miss you or make him call you more is a tricky pursuit.

You can’t really whine and tell him that you miss him, and wish he’d call you more often.

But could there be a way to make him miss you more, just like that?

How to make him miss you

How many times have we sat by the phone wondering what the man in our life is up to, and when is he ever going to call us again!

Now I’m not saying men don’t think about their girlfriends.

But I am indeed saying that the novelty of a new relationship wears off faster for a man than for a woman.

Why does this happen? Well, it’s simple, because women give in too easily and reveal all even more easily.

Learn how to make him call you more and miss you more by understanding these simple tips.

HOW TO MAKE HIM MISS YOU

#1 Surprise him

There’s no point in being an open book early in a relationship.

Keep him interested and into you by mentioning to him the summer you spent in Paris by yourself or your skills on the violin. Go out to a karaoke bar one night and floor him with your singing ability.

Never let him know who you really are, let him experience that by being with you.

#2 Be sincere

Make him feel like he’s found his soul mate in you. The idea is to be sincere.

Genuinely listen to what he has to say. Ask questions, and keep in mind what and who he talks about so that the next time he brings it up, you can show him that you actually do listen.

#3 Have no expectations

It’s a common mistake that every girl makes when she expect that a man is as hooked on you as you are on him, or that he is going to be exactly like your sappy man-child of an ex-boyfriend. Remind yourself why you ditched your ex.

If he doesn’t arrive at your doorstep with a dozen red roses every day, it does not mean that he is not into you.

HOW TO MAKE HIM MISS YOU – DIRTY, SNEAKY WAYS!

Read on for a few really sneaky ways to make him miss you and make him call you more.

#1 Hang up before he does

If you end the conversation before he does, it’ll keep him wanting more. Admit it, it happens to you all the time. Well, maybe in some cases, playing hard to get really does work.

#2 Do not accept any last minute dates

This is a sneakier variant of the first way to make him miss you more. Never, I repeat, never ever make it seem like you’re poised at the edge of your seat waiting for him to make time for you. Not only does this make you look like the ultimate loser, it will make him take you for granted. You should never accept the option of being Plan B.

#3 Great perfume

Pick the perfect perfume, and remember that the key word here is subtlety. You’ll know it has worked when he keeps leaning in. But remember to take it easy and not douse yourself in fragrances. You’d also want a leave a trace of it on him so that he remembers you after he drives you home.

MAKE HIM CALL YOU MORE: WILL IT WORK?

So what do you do if (god forbid) all your hard work doesn’t work and he still doesn’t call more or miss you more? First of all, don’t jump into conclusions. For all you know, there could have been an emergency.

You may call once or leave a message but do not overdo it and fill his inbox with “whr r u” and “y hvnt u cald” messages. Secondly do not obsess, immerse yourself in those hobbies you wowed him with. And finally if he calls you a month later without an excuse asking you out on a date, do not accept it. That would be an insult to your womanhood.

You have to accept rejection as a part of life and that it happens to everyone all the time. If things don’t work out, don’t sweat it.

After all, you do know the best tips on how to make him miss you and make him call you more. If it’s not working, perhaps he’s just not that into you.

Men Who Stare at Women

MEN WHO STARE AT WOMEN

Team Lovepanky

Staring at women is a fun hobby for most men, but seriously, what is it with men who stare at women? The Super Fella explains everything you need to know about the Stare, and how to stop a guy from doing just that.

What’s the real reason behind why men stare at women?

Each time a woman walks past, most men just can’t stop staring at her.

A few men may be discreet, while a few perverts may go “strip mode”, but either ways, men who stare at women incessantly are just no good.

Understanding why men stare at women

For most of my life, I had never really figured that women get annoyed when men stare at them.

But I guess it does bother women, because I’ve heard the story of the “scary stares” from girlfriends one too many times.

I for one, have never really experienced an ugly reverse stare from a woman, so you can forgive me for not figuring this out earlier.

But then, when men stare at women and the women don’t like it nor do they glance back, I really don’t think that qualifies for a flirtatious stare exchange.

But either ways, I don’t know what that stare could be called, so let’s just call it ‘the Stare’!

Men and staring at women

The last time I was out in a coffee shop with a girl pal of mine, I could sense that she was feeling quite uncomfortable, but she just shrugged it off when I asked her about it.

After a while, she told me about a guy who left the coffee shop just then. Apparently, he was doing ‘the stare’ thing with her! Oooh, it sounds creepy, doesn’t it? Almost as bad as Grudge Part I, she told me.

I was quite surprised because an occasional stare is complimenting, if the guy’s presentable enough. But then, she tells me it doesn’t matter how good the guy is, if it’s ‘the stare’ that he’s using, that’s just creepy and annoying.

To me, men who stare at women constantly sounded hilarious. To her, it was freaky. So that was my cue. I had to enlighten all women about ‘the stare’ and about men who stare at women. To blow the dust off the surface, ‘the stare’ isn’t just an ‘I’m-so-shy-I’d-wet-my-pants-if-I-looked-twice’ kind of thing from a guy. It’s actually more like the stare that forces you to time travel back fifty thousand years and see a hairy ape-like man grunting and beating his chest!

Now that I picture that, the hair on the back of my neck seems to stand up. I’m just being dramatic here, really, so I can relate to all the poor women who’ve had to put up with the knee buckling stare.

Men who stare at women and the way they think

So why do men stare at women really? First off, men stare because their eyes need action. Secondly, because they want to. Thirdly, because they can! However much it pisses off a woman, men stare at women and will continue to do so. Most men who have understood the fact that we live in the 21st century don’t stare hard at women, but men who haven’t yet figured that they’re way past the Stone Age still stare at women like they’re getting set for a mating ritual.

It’s those men you see, men who stare at women with such intensity that women would be confused whether the guy’s constipating or just trying to fart real bad. Now that’s the guy who has ‘the stare’ in his eyes. And that’s the guy you’ve got to have in your blind spot.

Now I’m the kind of guy who hates seeing a woman in a spot of trouble. I’m not a male chauvinistic pig, and I don’t mind sitting in the passenger seat of a car, while a woman’s driving, though the ride can be a bit freaky at times. And I’m the guy who stops the car and gets off to help, if a woman’s having a fight with a cab driver or fixing a flat tire. Women are sweet, but some men take their sweetness as a sign of vulnerability, which sucks. Okay, I’m digressing a wee bit too much.

Why do men stare at women instead of talking?

It’s all in the head, you see. When the man was still a boy, most other bigger boys and men told him that it’s not easy to talk with woman. The big men say this to cover up their own shortcomings with women. The smaller boys use this as an excuse to squirm out of making a move on a girl.

The point here is, the first thing that pops into a man’s mind when he wants to approach a woman is, “Will she insult me?” And with that one thought, a drum beat starts drumming away inside his head. And it just gets worse as he gets closer to starting a conversation with a woman.

Most men hate that feeling of getting spurned by a woman, and they definitely hate that drumbeat that’s their heart as they approach women. So they just sit back and stare at women. It’s the next best alternative for a loser of a guy who’s so sure he’d be spurned if he’d ever make a move. So he just sits back, and devours as much of you as he possibly can without making himself feel uncomfortable. These guys are just losers anyways, and they’re the ones who end up with goats or animals to give them company in bed, unless one of the women he stares at, finds it exciting and falls right into his arms.

Do men stare at all women?

All women. Definitely. Most women think men stare only at beautiful girls, petite girls, or girls with breasts that fill their shirts really well, but men who use ‘the stare’ don’t really give a damn. They just want attention back.

They want to stare right at you, and hope you’ll stare back. Of course, you’re going to be curious at first and give him a few glances out of curiosity. But these men take these little innocent glances as a sign of triumph. They think they’re on stage two of hooking up, now that they’re past the ‘stare, watch, and wait for reciprocation’ stage, and they try giving women that creepy smile along with ‘the stare’. This is when you’d feel like throwing up all over his annoying face.

Men who stare at women know you won’t really do anything about it, so they continue staring at women wherever they are. It’s annoying, but at least now you know why men stare at women.

But do you want to know how to piss the men who stare at women off, or what men really imagine when they stare? Click here to continue reading about why guys stare at girls to get the real dirty picture!

How to Think Like a Man and Impress your Guy

HOW TO THINK LIKE A MAN AND IMPRESS YOUR GUY

Team Lovepanky

Men complain that women are just too different and difficult to understand. So learn to think like a man and impress your guy just the way he wants!

Do you want to know to think like a man, especially in a relationship?

Ever heard your man grumble that you just don’t understand him?

Or did he whine about how women are just so different?

Now before you try changing yourself for his sake, you should know that men may whine a lot about women and their behavior.

But all said and done, men still want women to behave like women, and leave the “manly” behavior to the men.

There are a few times though, when you behaving like a man can make him exceptionally happy.

So if you want to know how to think like a man, and impress your guy, here are a few starting points.

How to think like a man

Thinking like a man is easy. Girls grow up and become women. Boys get bigger and become men.

If you want to think like a man, all you need to do is bring out your inner tomboy child.

Try these manly behavior traits when you’re with your own man. And big chances are, he’ll bear hug you in happiness or brag about how his girlfriend is the bestest in the whole world to all his friends!

Men don’t beat around the bush

If you want to think like a man, start with this one.

When you’re angry, do you always tell your man straight out about the reason behind your frustration? Most women don’t. They’d rather hold it in and grumble in a corner while the man goes back into a series of flashbacks just to understand what and where he did wrong. And almost always, until he realizes what offended his woman, he pays the price.

Men don’t do that. If your man is angry with you, he’d rather just blurt it out to you in a bad way than hold it in and rephrase the crushing annoyance in a manner that would have the maximum impact. If you want to be a man, the next time you’re upset with him for something, say it out straight and don’t beat around the bush. At least then, he’d know what he’s apologizing for!

Men like their space

Ever seen your man sitting by himself and happily building a car scale model or polishing his car? He likes doing that. Men absolutely love their space. He may feel guilty at times and try to spend more time with you to make up for it though.

The best way to deal with this is by keeping yourself occupied with your own hobby once in a while. Go out with your friends now and then, or indulge yourself in a few activities that you enjoy around your own place. By doing this, you’d lift your man’s bag of guilt off his back, and help him appreciate your independence a lot more!

Men like sex a lot more than foreplay

All women know this well. Your man may be nice enough to spend a while indulging in foreplay for your satisfaction, so learn to return the favor now and then by excusing him off a few tongue twister moves and cuddles before sex. Take him straight to bed and ask him to get on top as soon as you feel ready down there. He’d probably be surprised, but it’s going to be a happy one

Your man loves his gadgets and games

All men love playing on their game consoles or even spending time with their little remote controlled cars. It may seem immature, but for a man, it gives him a bit of time to get away from the world. Now men know their women would never understand this fascination.

But if you want to know how to think like a man, let him know that you can enjoy a good game too. The next time your man’s out for a while, play with his man toys and try to enjoy a good game. There’s a good chance that you may understand his fascination after a while too.

And when your man does get back home and sees you busy enjoying his game, there’s a big chance his eyes will well up with tears of joy!

Men love getting wasted

Men just love losing control of their senses now and then. Every man has his own reason, all the way from hoping he’d get molested in a drunken stupor by a group of sexy girls, to drinking being his way of dealing with the crap life throws at him.

Plan a Saturday night for him. Stock up your refrigerator with beer and booze and get wasted together. Just make sure the doors are locked and you’re close to the bed and the loo. Remember, the fun starts when both of you start trash talking. The best part is that your man would never forget those happy nights when you both have fun binge drinking together. Dealing with the hangover come Sunday morning, well, that’s a small price for a load of happiness, isn’t it?

Men love porn

Ever caught your man in front of his computer late at night with his hands deep inside his pants? Of course, your man will be embarrassed to get caught in a compromising position.

You may be pissed off or even insulted to see that he actually had to watch another naked woman to get an erection and have a bit of fun when he already has you. It’s natural that you’d feel that way, but men don’t understand that.

For men, porn is porn. And looking at another naked woman or two isn’t cheating, it’s having a good time.

Instead of rebuking him or getting upset and throwing a pillow for him to sleep on the couch, join him and watch the movie together if you want to think like a man. Watching erotica together can be a lot of fun and he’ll feel relieved too.  How many lucky guys get to have sex with their woman while watching a few other women at the same time? And odds are, you’ll love the hot men in the movie too!

Times when he won’t enjoy your manly behavior

Now that you know how to think like a man, use these tips to impress him and let him know how understanding you can be.

But at the same time, don’t overdo it. It would only upset him or make him wonder what’s going on. Here are a few great examples of woman showing man behavior gone wrong.

# Sex is just sex. Don’t fall asleep immediately after sex like a man does, without even looking at him. If it happens a few times in a row, he’ll probably spoon you and cry himself to sleep.

# Men look at other women even if they’re in love. Don’t do the same. He’d probably pick a fight with the guy you’re staring at, or think you’re a flirty cheat-in-the-box. But use this move if he disrespects you by ogling a lot at other women all the time.

# Men don’t change their favorite frayed pants or tee shirts unless his woman throws it out. If you wear your old, fading clothes and laze on the couch, he’ll probably think you’re starting to look ugly.

# Men burp and fart with their friends. But in your endeavor to think like a man, don’t ever do that. He’d think he’s turning gay or you’re turning into a guy. Either ways, it’s not good news for you.

Now that you know how to think like a man, try these moves and impress your guy with ease. Well, just as long as you don’t go overboard with your manly behavior!

How to Keep a Guy Interested: 30 Effortlessly Easy and Sexy Ways

HOW TO KEEP A GUY INTERESTED: 30 EFFORTLESSLY EASY AND SEXY WAYS

Team Lovepanky

Want to know how to keep a guy interested in you no matter what? Here are 30 sexy ways to make yourself dreamy and desirable in your man’s eyes.

Many girls may assume that guys are fickle and have a low interest span.

But in reality, guys are no different from girls when it comes to staying happy in a relationship.

Guys, just like girls, love novelty.

And they always want to be with a girl who’s desirable, and one that’s envied by other girls and desired by other guys.

Do you want to be that girl?

How to keep a guy interested

To keep a guy interested in you, you just need to remember a few ways to keep his interest aroused and his desire in you peaked.

Here are 30 sexy ways to do just that!

Use these tips on how to keep a guy interested in you, and you’d see how easy it can be to make him want you all the time.

#1 Be spontaneous. Shock him, awe him, make plans for the evening or plan an entire elaborate date by yourself. Surprise him and never be too predictable.

#2 Don’t change yourself. Stay true to the real person that you are. Don’t change yourself constantly assuming he doesn’t like your personality. Be creative, but stick to your comfort zone.

#3 Take initiatives in bed. Your guy may like taking control in bed, but when you dominate him and show off your confidence, he can’t help but be awed by your confidence and sexiness in bed.

#4 Smell great all the time. Always smell great around him but don’t overpower subtle fragrances with sickly sweet perfumes though. Always smell good, and pay special attention to your personal hygiene and body odor.

#5 Awe his friends. Men are competitive. As long as he thinks he has the best girl in his social circle, he’ll always cling to you and want to be with you. Awe his friends and make them think you’re a great girl, and you’ve done a great job.

#6 Learn to seduce him. Seduction doesn’t stop in bed. Be sexy around him and be creative wherever you go.

#7 Show interest in his hobbies. A guy would absolutely love a girl who shows interest in his special hobbies, be it playing on his Xbox or climbing a mountain. Men want to spend their lives with a woman who truly understands them and connects to them.

#8 Don’t be a drama queen. It’s alright to throw a fussy fit now and then if your guy disrespects you. But no matter what, don’t exaggerate a situation or blow it out of proportion just to prove a point. Guys can see through the acts of even the best drama queens.

#9 Be his shoulder to lean on. Give him your strength and support when he’s low on morale. Reassure him and help him confide his problems to you. Be his confidant and his warm pillow when he’s in the dumps and he’ll treat you like a goddess.

#10 Be his arm candy. Look good in his arms when both of you are together. Get a new hairstyle now and then, look fashionable and classy and he’ll never want you to leave his arms.

#11 Be financially secure. Be in control of your finances and have a well settled job. Guys love a girl with a steady head on her shoulders. At the same time, they stay a mile away from careless spendthrifts!

#12 Have intelligent conversations. A guy may want an arm candy when he’s on the streets, but he also wants a lover who can communicate with him and have intelligent conversations at the end of the day.

#13 Win over his family. Guys are attached to their families and a few guys are even loyal mama’s boys. Make his family and friends think you’re a catch and he’ll definitely love you more.

#14 Help him deal with life. Men may behave like the saviors of the world. But inside, they’re still little boys who need a cuddle and a hug now and then. Help your man deal with the issues life throws at him.

#15 Public display of affection. Your man may shy away from a bit of PDA, but he still loves it when you cling to his arms like a damsel in distress. It makes him feel more powerful and sexy!

#16 Stroke his ego. If you want to keep your guy interested and happy, learn to stroke his ego. Compliment his achievements and give him a pat on his back when he’s proud of something. Make him feel like a man and he’ll stay your man.

#17 Be independent and dependent. Confused? Be dependent when you’re with him. Be independent when you’re by yourself. It’ll make him feel more like a man when you’re around without really feeling like you’re needy when he’s busy doing something else.

#18 Be happy and interesting. Be interesting and creative with your life. See the happy side in everything, even in the most mundane of days. When you’re an optimist, your infectious happiness will definitely rub on to him.

#19 Don’t make him feel insecure. Flirt with others and talk to men, but never at the cost of his insecurity. When he’s around, hug him close and he’ll swell with affection for you.

#20 Don’t be easily available. Spend time with him, but don’t be ready for him at his beck and call. Be there for him, but make him miss you when you aren’t around.

#21 Be smart and sassy. Don’t ask stupid questions. Guys may like a dumb bimbette at first, but they’re not looking for a long term relationship with them.

#22 Don’t be clingy and needy. Guys like a damsel who needs their help. But that stops once the infatuation period is over. Show him that you’re self reliant and he’ll always look for ways to help you and please you.

#23 Be sexually innovative. Know your moves in bed and everywhere else. Have sex in different places, role play with him, wear an apron and nothing else while cooking something special, tie his hands to the bedpost… You get the drift, don’t you?

#24 Be a good cook. No matter what people say, the adage, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach still holds good.

#25 Learn to think like a guy. Guys and girls don’t always think along the same lines. Learn to think like him and his eyes will well up with happy tears to have the love of a woman so special.

#26 Don’t ever be a pushover. Don’t be the submissive wife. You don’t need to sit at his feet to earn his respect and love. Instead, be opinionated and throw him around when he throws his weight around you.

#27 Whip him when he can’t behave. Treat him like a spoilt child when he doesn’t behave. Ignore his childish behavior or scold him when he behaves like a slob. Be unpredictable and rude when he misbehaves, and he’ll fear you and respect you at the same time.

#28 Make him proud of you. Guys may be shallow at first sight, but they still want a girl they can respect and admire. Be an achiever and a girl he can look up to in awe.

#29 Respect yourself. You’re not a doormat. Let him know that you have the strength to move on if he does something stupid or treats you badly. Always make it look like you’re the biggest prize he’s won. You don’t have to call yourself a prize in front of him, but show it to him by ignoring him or pushing him out of the bedroom when he misbehaves.

#30 Make him dependent on you. As long as he thinks he can’t live without you or if he feels helpless without you, he’ll always stay interested in you.

Pick the traits you can use and you’ll see how easy it can be to keep a guy interested in you. But never let him use you or treat you like a pushover. And don’t think twice about punishing him or putting him in his place when he doesn’t treat you right.

Earn his respect and love. And let him earn yours. Treat him with love and affection, but only if he deserves it. After all, as long as he fears losing a catch like yourself, he’ll never put a toe out of line, would he?

These 30 ways on how to keep a guy interested in you will work perfectly, just as long as you remember that everything in love has to be mutual. Make him treat you right, and show him how special and nice you can be if you choose to!

WHAT MEN LIKE IN WOMEN MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE

What Men Like in Women More than Anything Else

Team Lovepanky

Men can’t help but love women. But do you really know what men like in women and what is it about a woman that they find most attractive? Find out here.

Men like women. A lot.

But there are a few kinds of women that men absolutely adore and fall in love with, wherever they go.

Ever seen an ad on the television where a girl walks across the street and all the guys either trail her or wolf whistle in appreciation?

Want to be that girl?

When it comes to appreciation at first sight, what different men like in women doesn’t really vary a lot.

It’s the simple things really.

And it’s really simple to become that woman who can make heads turn and men swoon wherever you go.

Find out what men like in women and be that attractive woman that all men want and desire.

But then again, once you know what men really like in women, what are you going to do with all that attention?!

What men like in women

Attraction and infatuation at first sight are very different from the deep appreciation that men get once they get to know a woman well.

But for starters, here are the special aspects about women that make men thank the one above for creating women in the first place.

#1 A cheerful attitude

The cheerful laugh or a flirty giggle of a happy, cheerful woman can melt even the hardest of manly hearts. Have a happy, cheerful personality and try to look at the happier side of life all the time. There’s something about a cheerful woman whose eyes light up with joy that draws all men to her.

#2 The way she looks and dresses

It’s always easier to attract attention from men when you make an effort to look good and dress well. A bright red umbrella is always a lot more attention grabbing on a rainy day amidst all the dull umbrellas, doesn’t it?

Dress well and feel good about yourself. You don’t really have to try and stand out with bold, flashy colors all the time. Just dress like a perfect ten in well fitting clothes and appear confident. And yes, don’t forget that dab of perfume to leave a trail of men swooning over your fragrance as you walk past them!

#3 Flirty gestures

What men like in women is a streak of flirty seduction. Do you curl your lips or hold a pen in your lip when you’re trying to come up with an idea? Do you wink or raise your eyebrows flirtily when you say goodbye or pass a smart remark? Well, if you do indulge in any of those expressions or even a million other expressions that make you look cuter-than-cute, then you’re already on your way to make hearts beat a lot faster.

Men can’t get enough of flirty gestures from women. Stand in front of the mirror and try a few flirty moves. It may seem dumb at first, but hey, remember what men like in women and try this tip. It’s guaranteed to show results within seconds!

#4 Just a little bit of skin

Want that glance to turn into a second and third glance? Learn to show a bit of skin. An outright pound of cleavage or a slab of midriff can seem attractive, but it’s also trashy and crude. And it makes you look like you’re trying too hard to please and get attention.

Play subtle. It works a lot better. A shirt or a tee that ends just right around where your jeans start, or a perfectly fitting top with a wider neck that shows a bit but yet needs a bit of craning to get a peep is just perfect for men. They love the nearly-there peeks and their curiosity would drive them crazy enough to stare, again and again.

#5 A seductive voice

If there’s anything that makes the hair on the back of a man’s neck stand in excitement, it’s a woman’s sweet and sexy voice. Now mastering the art of the husky voice takes time, so don’t give it too much of a thought just yet.

When you’re speaking with a man, speak in a low tone and avoid the high pitched glass shattering squeal that most women use when they’re surprised or ecstatic with joy. A low, soft voice inadvertently sounds more arousing and attractive. And the best part here, it’s easy to speak in a low, softer tone without seeming like you’re trying too hard. Try your new softer voice the next time you’re on the phone. And don’t blame us if the man on the other end gets flirty!

#6 A woman who asks for help

This is every man’s dream. Well, as long as he isn’t your man already!

Men like to feel wanted and appreciated by women. Most women think men are slobs who hate working or running errands, but that’s the case only if he’s already in a long term relationship with you. If he’s single and a woman with all the aforementioned characteristics walks up to him and asks him to help her out with a smile, he’d jump up like a jack in the box.

Men absolutely love a woman who asks for help. It makes them feel more macho, gives them an excuse to have a conversation with a pretty woman, and reawakens their evolutionary desire to be the provider and the protector. And when you thank a man with a flirty smile, there’s a good chance that he’d gush with awkward embarrassment and ask for your phone number!

#7 A woman’s ability to flirt back

Do you ever flirt back with a man, even if it’s just for fun? Many women feel awkward, embarrassed or even threatened when a friendly guy starts a little flirting game.

Just because you indulge in a friendly game of flirting doesn’t mean you’re falling for a guy, remember that. If you want to impress a man, have a fun conversation with him. If you bring your flirty expressions into the conversation, there’s a good chance that any guy would want to flirt with you or sweet talk you, even if he’s with his own girlfriend!

But you don’t always have to flirt back with a guy, sometimes when you play hard to get and blow hot or cold once in a while, it’ll throw a guy off guard and make him try harder to please you.

#8 A woman who acknowledges a man’s stare

You may like a guy who’s sipping his whiskey at the far end of the bar counter. How would you feel if he looks at you, gives you his dirtiest stare and looks away? You’d feel shattered, of course.

Men have a heart too, you know. If a guy’s trying to catch your attention or trying to exchange a glance, you don’t need to reciprocate all the time. But if he does seem decent enough, it’s a warm gesture to lock eyes for a second and look away.

You don’t need to date him or have his babies, but a simple acknowledgement that you noticed him can make his day, especially when you’re such a stunning woman with all the charms. You can look once and forget all about it, and any guy would appreciate that. If there’s one thing men like in women, it’s the ability to acknowledge a man without blowing him off in the first glance.

You could give him your dirtiest stare though, if he seems too eager to continue the game or makes a move to talk to you.

Now that you know what men like in women, use these eight tips and you’ll see how easy it can be to win the attention of men around you. And the best part, it’ll never appear like you’re trying to make an impression!

How Men Think When it Comes to Love and Relationships

HOW MEN THINK WHEN IT COMES TO LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS

Team Lovepanky

Ever wondered how men think about relationships? Understand the way a man’s mind works and you’ll be able to read him like a book, all the time.

There are so many things about a man’s mind that makes him predictable and easy to understand.

Have you ever wondered about how men think, especially when it comes to relationships and the opposite sex?

Sometimes, just understanding the way most men think can make life a lot easier for women when it comes to impressing a man, or even flattering him.

How men think

You may try to win a man’s heart, or make a deep impression on him or you may even want to change him to suit your whims and fancies.

Instead of trying to change your man to become your definition of a dream man, just use these simple tips.

And everything will fall perfectly into place, just as long as you remember how men think.

Men think all compliments are true

If there’s one think a woman can’t go wrong with, it’s a compliment.

Almost all men think all compliments addressed to them are completely true.

Compliment a man and he’ll never think it’s a lie. Women may think twice about a compliment, but men always believe what they hear.

Compliment a man and he’ll appreciate you for it, and think of you fondly each time he remembers that compliment.

Do you want your man to start working out? Just tell him he’s got great shoulders, with just a bit of fat covering his muscles. He’ll start working out just to try and retain that compliment. On the other hand, have you ever found your man butt naked and checking himself out in front of the mirror? Chances are, someone’s told him he’s got a sexy backside.

Men are easily impressed

You may find this ridiculous, but it’s so true! Men may know it and even be wary of it, but they just can’t help it. Men are easily impressed by women who flirt back with them or exchange a flirty smile. All men think women who reciprocate their moves or at least acknowledge it are the nicest and prettiest women on earth. Want him to do you a favor? Just bat your eyelids and smile.

But this doesn’t end with just single men. Even if you’ve been dating your man for a few years, just flirt with your man or tease him into submission. He may hate you for the manipulation, but he’ll still love you for your teasing and flirting.

Men think they’re the protectors

Men think of themselves as the protectors. Ever since the primate days, men have always been the hunters and the protectors while women have been the foragers and the nurturers. Rekindle that instinct in a man and he’ll love you for it.

Men love pleasing women, be it his girlfriend or an attractive woman on the street. Give him a chance to help you and he’ll fall in love with you for making him feel like a man.

Men think they’re alright with being treated as an equal

The modern man may assume that he’d perfectly happy in a world where women rule the world. But it’s just not true.

Men have always been the breadwinners and the ones who play a dominant role in the relationship. And when the tables turn and the woman plays the dominant role of a breadwinner, most men feel emasculated and vulnerable. When a man’s wife earns more than he does or yells at him in front of others, he can’t help but shrivel up or end up wanting to have an affair just to feel powerful again. This may make men seem like chauvinistic pigs, but it’s just the way they are.

If you do want to keep your man happy in the relationship even if you’re earning more money than him, never make him feel like he has no say or control over the relationship. Emasculating a man will only drop his libido and his interest in you.

Men think they’re emotionally strong

Men think they’re strong, but they aren’t, at least not inside the head. Men have epic egos, but those egos can be shattered easily. And once it’s shattered, it takes a long time for them to nurse their ego back to life.

Be it an issue with not being able to last long enough in bed, or trying to woo a woman who seems too good to get, if a man has one bad experience, it’s all he needs to stay away from the same situation.

Don’t ever shatter a man’s ego, he’ll hate you for it. And eventually, it’ll be the both of you that suffer in the relationship. He may sulk or pout after a ego shattering experience, but help your man-child nurse his ego back to life, and you’ll have a happy relationship where he’ll helplessly depend on you to make him feel like a better man.

Men think they care about a woman’s personality

Most men think they’re intellectual and deep, but they always fall for looks over anything else. Men are completely visual. It’s always been that way since men could think. Now what may seem attractive to one man doesn’t always have to be attractive to another, but it always comes down to infatuation at first sight for all men. But at the same time, infatuation and love are two completely different emotions for men.

So the next time you want to get that second glance or make your man listen to what you have to say, dress sexy. He may drool a bit, but he’ll still listen to whatever you have to say.

Men think they like a woman who makes the first move

Men may say they like a woman who asks a guy out. It may make their life easier when it comes to wooing a woman, but subconsciously men just don’t appreciate a woman who makes the first move.

Men think women who ask a guy out are too easy to get. He may appreciate the gesture, but really, are you not getting any attention from men? Otherwise, why would you jump on a man yourself?

Unless you make a man work for your affection, somewhere deep inside, he’ll always assume he’s the better one in the relationship who can get any girl he wants if he really tries. After all, he didn’t really have to fight off any competition to get you, did he?

Men and women may think along the same lines in many ways, but not in love. Understand these tips on how men think about relationships and attraction because it can make all the difference in wooing or keeping a man committed.

Damsel in Distress: Why Men Find Them So Irresistible!

damsel in distress
DAMSEL IN DISTRESS: WHY MEN FIND THEM SO IRRESISTIBLE!
Ron Roberson
There’s something about a helpless girl that men can’t resist. But why is that and how can you use this? Find out why men love a damsel in distress.
Most women hate a damsel in distress.
Men on the other hand, can’t help falling for damsels in distress.
For men, it’s just inevitable.
Every time a man sees a pretty lass who needs help, a slob of a man turns into a chivalrous knight in shining armor.
Well, at least until he’s made enough of an impression to make her fall for him.
While much of the courting game of dating and falling in love depends on mutual attraction, there’s another secret force that most men and women don’t think about – the evaluation of desirability.
Do you really like a guy or does he really like you?
How badly do you want to go out with this person?
Answering these questions to yourself will help you understand and evaluate someone you meet as a potential date.
Why men love a damsel in distress
While courting, women like to be treated with care and respect. Men like to be treated like men.
When either sex experiences these emotions while spending time with a particular member of the opposite sex, they end up inevitably desiring the person even if there isn’t any mutual attraction to begin with.
Understand this little truth and the whole case of the damsel in distress will start to make sense to anyone.
Damsels in distress make a man feel like a real man
Throughout evolution, men have always been the protectors. Recent decades may have subdued a man and his protective streak, but his urge to be the defender and the protector of all things good still gives him a rush like no other. Why else do you think men love playing gory video games where they play the lead character? It makes them feel good. When a man sees a woman who needs help, he instinctively feels the urge to help her.
Damsels are easily approachable
Men approach women almost all the time in the dating field. When a man finds a situation where a woman needs help, he understands two things. One, he instinctively wants to help her. And secondly, she’s going to be easily approachable and perhaps even grateful for his help. And all men love women who are easily approachable.
A man’s ego swells when he helps a girl
When a man helps a woman, shows off his brute strength to her and gets thanked for it, he feels good about the whole thing. He feels more powerful and happy, knowing that he was able to impress a woman with his abilities. And when a man feels good about himself, he’ll obviously like the damsel in distress who helped him feel better about himself.
Men stay longer in a relationship when they feel like men
Men like to wear the pants in the relationship. And even if they don’t wear the pants, they want to feel like they do. With their epic egos and innate trait to protect, they want to feel like they are the driving force of the relationship.
When a man is in a relationship with a woman who behaves like she needs his protection and help, he’s always on guard when he’s with her. He instinctively becomes protective and feels more like a man.
Being in a relationship with a woman who wants him and needs him is every man’s fantasy. He feels like a man, he puts on his best behavior, and everyone wins.
But at the same time, there’s a thin line between needing a man and being needy. Get this wrong, and you could do more damage to the relationship than good.
HOW TO BE A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS WHO’S NOT NEEDY
It’s easy to be the woman that you are, and yet make your man feel like a real man. Just use these tips, and you’ll definitely make him appreciate you and feel great about himself.
Remember that men love an independent woman. But they feel terrible about themselves when their woman doesn’t need them at all. You may be perfectly capable of handling everything in your life, but ask a man for a manly helping hand now and then and he’ll feel good about it.
Ask him to help you in a man’s job
Are you having trouble carrying something heavy? Do you need help fixing a car, or perhaps a door hinge? Or are you feeling nervous to walk down the street after dusk? Ask a man for help.
A man likes helping a woman when he feels like he’s doing a superior job. Make him assume there’s no way you could ever have made it through without his help and his ego will swell. He’ll definitely feel more like a man around you. And yes, he’ll like you for it.
Thank him and don’t forget that flirty smile
While men absolutely love helping a woman in need, they are put off by women who can’t be grateful for it. If you ask a guy to help you, but don’t really show your appreciation, he may just avoid helping you or may even ignore you. No one likes being taken for granted, especially a man.
Always thank a man and compliment him when he helps you. Complimenting a man with a flirty smile and a twinkle in your eyes will definitely make his heart skip a beat. And he’ll be more than happy to help you out again.
Show off your independence
If you’re dating a guy, don’t play the damsel in distress all the time. Ask him for some manly help when he’s around. But when he isn’t with you, don’t call him over and ask him to help you out unless you really do need his help. By letting him know that you’re completely capable of running your own life effortlessly without his help, he’d respect you more. A man always loves an independent woman who doesn’t really need him, but wants him.
Drawing the line
Ask him for his help and assistance with the manly jobs, but do it only occasionally. He may love a damsel in distress, but he definitely doesn’t need an overdose of machismo. If he sees you carrying something heavy with difficulty and immediately jumps up to help you, he’s still happy with the damsel in distress in you.
But if he doesn’t budge to help you, he’s either a slob or you’ve been asking him too many favors recently. Asking a man too many favors can disgruntle him. So always remember the thin line.
Play the damsel in distress and make him feel like a man, and he’ll love you for it. Play needy and make him feel like your slave, and he’ll hate you for it.
And now that you know why men love a damsel in distress, go on and make some guy’s day. You’ll get the manly help you need, and he’ll feel a lot better about himself. And somewhere along the way, he’ll start to fall in love with you too!

Dating Mythbusters: There Is a Better Half Out There for You

Lukas/Pexels

DATING MYTHBUSTERS: THERE IS A BETTER HALF OUT THERE FOR YOU

Chamin Ajjan

Does your “better half” exist?

We hear it all of the time.  “I am ready to meet my better half?” “You are so lucky that you have found your better half!” “When are you going to settle down with your better half?” This turn of phrase has been used so many times that it has become the way we describe our partners or potential partners. So people everywhere are out there searching for this “better half”. You know, the one person whose presence in your life will not only make you feel complete but will also do so by being BETTER than you are. Wait…WHAT?!

The mere notion that there is a better half out there for you implies that you are not complete on your own. To be happy, you need another person to share your life with who will magically transform your lack luster existence into a life of bliss. The problem is, this will never work! Here’s why:

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