THE PSYCHOLOGY OF ARROGANCE
5 reasons that arrogant people (regrettably) often succeed
Raise your hand if you like arrogant people?! … Just as I figured – no hands! Hey, I’m with you!
I work with a lot of people and, over the years, I have come to truly believe that there is at least a splash of good in each and every person. And that we all have a ticket on the same ride. I try to be forgiving and I try to respect others as best I can.
This said, if there is one quality in others that gets my goat, it is arrogance. In an article summarizing a provocative set of studies, Johnson, Silverman, Shyamsunder, Swee, Rodopman, Cho, and Bauer (2010, p. 405) define arrogance as “stable belief of superiority and exaggerated self-importance that are manifested with excessive and presumptuous claims.” Sounds about right. We all know one. He or she might belittle you without warning in any context. This person almost definitely talks behind your back. And you go out of your way to avoid having to have interactions with this person as you fear that such interactions may leave you feeling bad for any number of reasons.
Please every parent and guardian should teach their children and wards, especially toddlers, very early about ‘PANTS’ rules. Times have changed and the world has become a very sick and pathetic place to live. There are many paedophiles and rapists out there. Be careful, and note that everyone is a suspect here.
We must prayerfully protect our children by arming them with the right information:
P – Private parts are private. Nobody is permitted to touch them.
A – Always remember that your body is yours and yours only.
IS BEING SEXY MORE IMPORTANT THAN BEING BEAUTIFUL?
Should we bring sexy back?
“I think being sexy is far more important for love and sex than beauty; and it is also quickly identifiable. If I see an unsexy pretty man, I can appreciate the looks but I don’t feel sexually attracted to him. This happens often, not just to me, not just to women. I’d like to think of myself as both sexy and good-looking.” A married woman
Both being sexy and beautiful enhance romantic attraction. Which one is more dominant? And which one is more positively received? The answer is not obvious.
WHY SIBLINGS FIGHT (AND WHY WE ALL FIGHT LIKE SIBLINGS)
Siblings fight because they assume love is a limited resource. They assume they have to compete for caring. In other words, siblings are just like the rest of us…
I was brutal to my siblings.
I beat up on my little brother’s shoulder and I beat up on my little sister’s heart. When we were all grown and had gone our separate ways, I realized what I’d done, and I started to beat up on myself. I felt guilty about being a bully and sad about the lost opportunity to be their friend.
Even after they accepted my apology, I couldn’t forgive myself.
7 LESSONS FROM 10 YEARS OF COACHING PEOPLE THROUGH DEPRESSION AND HEARTBREAK
There are wounds that never show on our bodies that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds. Depression and heartbreak are two such wounds. I know, from experience.
About a decade ago, in quick succession, Angel and I dealt with several significant, back-to-back losses and life changes, including: losing Angel’s brother, Todd, to suicide, losing our mutual best friend, Josh, to cardiac arrest, and losing our home in the downturn of the economy. The pain inflicted by each of these experiences was absolutely brutal, and enduring them one after another broke our hearts and knocked us both into a moderate state of depression. There was a long stretch of time when we shut out the world, shut out each other, and avoided our loved ones who were grieving alongside us.
Luckily, with the right support, and the gradual restoration of our inner resolve, we pushed forward, stronger and with a greater respect for life. And while there were many intricate steps to our recovery process that I’m leaving out here, the outcome of our journey ultimately led us to the work we do today, over a decade later. Through our course and coaching we have spent the better part of the past ten years leveraging our lessons learned to guide amazing human beings through the process of coping with significant bouts of depression and heartbreak (and other forms of adversity). The work has been anything but easy, but it’s also been incredibly rewarding and life-changing—it has undoubtedly been the most significant silver lining of the painful losses and life changes we were forced to endure.
FOR MY SAKE: STANDING IN THE GAP FOR YOUR PARTNER
It was my wedding night. I was so tired, and I needed a bath and rest. We had danced so much that my back was aching.
Husband was beginning to have funny ideas. He was beaming like a new born baby. In any case, I won’t blame him; any man in his position would not joke with this night because I was a warrior during our courtship. “No… No hugging. No pecking. No holding♀♀♀.” Top on my priority list was sexual purity till marriage.
The knock came. I was thinking, “Half past 11:00pm? Could that be Room Service?” Then with eyes popping, I heard my mother-in-law’s iron-like voice, “Tise, Michael, open up!”
DO YOU FEEL YOU ARE IN A ONE-SIDED RELATIONSHIP? HERE’S WHAT A THERAPIST RECOMMENDS
The good news is, if you’re currently in one, there’s hope.
There’s a specific moment in “500 days of Summer” when you FINALLY realize the thing you’ve tried to deny the entire movie. It’s the moment when Tom goes to Summer’s party with high expectations of restoring their relationship. And then he sees it: her ring. The engagement ring that did not come from him.
That’s when you realize this has been a one-sided relationship all along.
Some of us hate that movie. Maybe it’s because it goes against our idealistic senses of what a chick-flic should be. But it’s also possibly too close to home. Each of us can relate to having a one-sided relationship, whether friend or lover.
ONE DAILY REMINDER THAT WILL CALM THE CHAOS IN YOUR LIFE
Life can be hectic; sometimes chaos surrounds us in every imaginable direction.
But just because the world around us is in disarray, doesn’t mean the world within us has to be too.
That’s right, I’m saying there’s a way to stay sane in insane times. I’m saying you can get rid of all the insanity inside you created by others, the past, and uncontrollable events…
Just by being a simple witness of your thoughts.
24 SIGNS OF A HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON
Highly sensitive people often “feel too much” and “feel too deep”.
Are you a highly sensitive person? Do you know someone in your personal or professional life who may be highly sensitive? High sensitivity can be defined as acute physical, mental, and emotional responses to external (social, environmental) or internal (intra-personal) stimuli. A highly sensitive person may be an introvert, an extrovert, or a combination of both.
Although there are many positive attributes to being a sensitive person (such as greater ability to listen and affirm, greater empathy and intuitiveness, better understanding of others’ wants and needs, etc.), in this writing we will focus on aspects of high sensitivity which adversely affect one’s health, happiness and success, and often complicate relationships. Below are twenty-four signs of a highly sensitive person, with excerpts from my books: “Are You Highly Sensitive? How to Gain Immunity, Peace, and Self-Mastery(link is external)” and “How to Communicate Effectively with Highly Sensitive People(link is external)” These traits are organized into three major categories: Sensitivity About Oneself, Sensitivity About Others, and Sensitivity About One’s Environment.
TEN STEPS TO FREEING YOURSELF FROM YOUR WORRY
Robert L. Leahy
Turning worry on its head
Are you dwelling on negative thoughts about the future—predicting that dire or terrible things will happen? Do you lose sleep because of your worry, find yourself distracted, feel nauseated, exhausted, and tense? Worry is one of the most common psychological problems that many of us face, but some people find themselves worried about something on a daily basis. If that is the case, then you might be suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
What can you do?
You don’t have to be a passive victim of your intrusive and annoying worries. Let’s organize your response to worry by taking ten simple steps to address your worried thoughts. We are not going to try to think positively or ignore your worry. I am not telling you to believe in yourself or to think positively or to hope for the best. No, let’s ask some questions about your worry—let’s interrogate your worry. If you are like a lot of worriers you may find that your worry hijacks your mind, you find yourself chasing after thoughts and feelings that seem to control you, and you don’t have any tools to deal with your worry. Let’s find those tools now—and start using them.