Forgive Your Spouse

FORGIVE YOUR SPOUSE

You never realize the strength you receive once you forgive someone who wasn’t sorry, and accept an apology you never received. Today you must decide to forgive your spouse who hurt you intentionally. Not because they apologized, or because you enjoyed the pain that they caused you, but because your soul deserves peace.
 
Forgiveness is a choice to show mercy. It is a commitment not to hold on to count the offense against the offender.
 
Forgiveness is an expression of love. Just like God forgave you, forgive them also and pray for God’s intervention. Once your heart is sincere and pure, your prayers are heard. That’s when God starts moving into your situation and takes revenge against those who intentionally troubled and hurt you.

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7 Steps to Heal a Broken Heart

Pixabay

7 STEPS TO HEAL A BROKEN HEART

Chamin Ajjan

“Breaking Up Is Hard To Do” is not just a hit song from the 1960s, it is a fact. Anyone who has gone through a break up knows that a broken heart can be difficult to mend. This universal emotional response to the sudden, unexpected or unwanted loss of love is often characterized by an intense longing, hurt and/or desire for an ex or unrequited love. And it can hurt like hell. For some, it feels like their whole world is caving in on them. And in many cases, because the pain is so great and the path to mending it seems so daunting, people avoid healing their broken heart. This avoidance can lead to many unwanted side effects including but not limited to greater internal conflict, complicated emotional responses, withdrawal and difficulty in future relationships.

So, how do you heal a broken heart? Here are a few tips I have picked up in my training, clinical experiences and late night calls with girlfriends and family members.

Take Your Time

Pixaby
Source: Pixabay

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12 Signs it’s Time for You to Let Go

12 Sure Signs it's Time to Let Go This Year

12 SIGNS IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO LET GO

Marc Chernoff

The renowned psychologist Carl Rogers noted that people are often unhappy because of a lack of congruence in their lives, which is another way of saying momentary complexity blinds us to the simple solutions of life.  For Rogers, simply sitting with a patient and having them talk through their problems, without the therapist leading them or making judgments or giving advice, was the best way for them to let go of their problems.  Rogers determined that when you give a person a safe and supportive space to think through things, they tend to do so more effectively.

Right now, I want to give you a safe and supportive space to think, so you can let go of any extra baggage that’s been weighing you down.  Try this: pause for a second to notice what’s going on in your body.  Are your jaw muscles clenched?  Are your shoulders or neck tightened?  Do you notice a part of your body holding on to tension—perhaps tension fueled by something you’re subconsciously worried about?

Most of us are holding tension in our bodies and stress in our minds, whether we realize it or not.

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The Real Cost of Divorce

THE REAL COST OF DIVORCE

Written by: seouser

Marriage can be difficult. Sometimes you may feel like you’re at your wits end and the relationship can’t be saved.

But are you aware of the real costs of getting divorce? It’s far beyond just money.

Check out the infographic we put together below about different stats related to divorce in Canada and the United States.

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A New Appreciation for Anxiety

A NEW APPRECIATION FOR ANXIETY

LaVerna Wilk

Anxiety is an interesting animal. There is nothing fun about it, no one enjoys a rapid heart rate, the hit of adrenaline, the racing thoughts – no one would choose panic attacks. Yet, there seems to be something perversely protective about anxiety at times.

I know that sounds crazy, even to me, but hear me out.

I made an observation one day as I was doing neurotherapy with a client. We had her hooked up to a monitor and we were training her Theta/Beta ratio at the back of her head. Together we observed that as her brainwaves were learning to cope better with anxiety and reduce her symptoms, that her anxiety was actually increasing.  As we talked about this she stated that, inside her, it almost felt like we were “storming the castle” so to speak, and that there was an urge to hold on to the anxiety and resist the changes we were trying to achieve. As we began to explore that, she was eventually able to articulate that while she didn’t enjoy her anxiety and the limits it imposed on her life, in theory there were ways in which it was almost soothing and at times protective.  Her symptoms included anxiety about traffic and specifically about being in an accident. When she absolutely had to go somewhere with her husband she would have large reactions to imagined “near misses” at intersections, and was obsessed with watching the rear-view mirror so she would be able to warn him if they were about to get rear-ended, etc. She had lived with these symptoms for so long that she had become quite accustomed to simply telling people, “No, I can’t go to the concert/movies/mall because my anxieties have been quite high lately.”  What we discovered after much digging was that her anxieties kept her vigilant, not only for actual threats to her safety, but imagined ones as well.

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1 Thing Unhappy People Refuse To Do For Themselves

1 THING UNHAPPY PEOPLE REFUSE TO DO FOR THEMSELVES

Angel Chernoff

Life is really hard sometimes. There’s no escaping that reality. It’s impossible to live well without encountering a certain level of struggle, and there are some seasons in our lives that are especially heartbreaking.

For Marc and me, one such season occurred over the course of 15 months when we were in our late-20’s. It was a period of profound loss, beginning when we lost our jobs and our house in the downturn of the economy. It started out as a financially scary and uncertain time for our family. Worry seeped into everyday life. “Unhappiness” is the simplest word to describe it.

Then, as we were learning to navigate our new reality, we were hit with a devastating loss: the death of a mutual best friend from sudden cardiac arrest. The loss of such a key figure in our lives was intense! We were absolutely devastated and knocked down to what seemed like the lowest of lows for weeks on end. And just as we were beginning to get back on our feet, my older brother died by suicide.

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13 Happy Things You Need for a Perfectly Happy Life!

happy life

13 HAPPY THINGS YOU NEED FOR A PERFECTLY HAPPY LIFE!

Elizabeth Arthur

Wondering how to have a happy life? You don’t need too much to get that perfect life. All you need are just these 13 happy things, and nothing more!

A happy life is the dream, isn’t it?

That’s what all of us want.

We struggle and toil day in and day out, with the hope of abundant happiness in the future.

But what if I told you that a happy life is just right around the corner?

What if you could attain it as soon as you read this feature or within a few weeks?

It’s true, really.

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Connecting with Your Pain Could Save Your Life

person crying beside bed

CONNECTING WITH YOUR PAIN COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE

Jenny TeGrotenhuis

Charlie was in my office yesterday. He was all smiles. I commended him on the quick transformation he had made in his relationship with his wife, Melinda. Even though his job had been extremely stressful lately, and he was experiencing a flare-up of symptoms from a chronic illness, he was content and hopeful. Melinda and their two children, James and Alissa, were doing well and settling into the back-to-school routines of basketball practice and music lessons.

“It seems like a long time ago,” Charlie said, referring to his suicide attempt two years earlier. We had just spent a long time processing something he’d once been reluctant to talk about. It was his second close brush with taking his own life.

The numbness and depression that had been his familiar companions through adolescence and young adulthood, layered with the lack of parental nurture and constant emotional chaos from his parents’ fighting, had left him with few internal emotional resources. He was familiar with a hollow ache inside that could not seem to be filled. He’d had no modeling in his life about how to really notice his feelings or interpret what they meant, so he was not in touch with his true and legitimate needs for loving connection, validation, security, and support.

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Sabotaging Your Happiness: 12 Ways You Can Ruin Your Life

find happiness

SABOTAGING YOUR HAPPINESS: 12 WAYS YOU CAN RUIN YOUR LIFE

Tiffany Grace Reyes

You can have everything you’ve ever wanted and more, yet still be dissatisfied and unhappy with your life. But what can you do to change that?

If you feel down in the dumps about yourself, it’s probably because you have habits, attitudes, and actions that are hindering you from being the best person that you can be. In fact, these things can even ruin you and your chances of happiness. Find out how you might be ruining your own life and the things you can do to stop this from happening.

You are ruining your own life…

#1 By being lazy. It’s natural to be lazy, but it can help tremendously if you keep yourself motivated and driven. Putting off things by procrastinating or not going after what you really want because of the effort it entails is the definition of laziness. This attitude holds you back from progress and growth, whether in your career or your personal life.

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A New Appreciation for Anxiety

A NEW APPRECIATION FOR ANXIETY

LaVerna Wilk

Anxiety is an interesting animal. There is nothing fun about it, no one enjoys a rapid heart rate, the hit of adrenaline, the racing thoughts – no one would choose panic attacks. Yet, there seems to be something perversely protective about anxiety at times.

I know that sounds crazy, even to me, but hear me out.

I made an observation one day as I was doing Neurotherapy with a client. We had her hooked up to a monitor and we were training her Theta/Beta ratio at the back of her head. Together we observed that as her brainwaves were learning to cope better with anxiety and reduce her symptoms, that her anxiety was actually increasing.  As we talked about this she stated that, inside her, it almost felt like we were “storming the castle” so to speak, and that there was an urge to hold on to the anxiety and resist the changes we were trying to achieve. As we began to explore that, she was eventually able to articulate that while she didn’t enjoy her anxiety and the limits it imposed on her life, in theory there were ways in which it was almost soothing and at times protective.  Her symptoms included anxiety about traffic and specifically about being in an accident. When she absolutely had to go somewhere with her husband she would have large reactions to imagined “near misses” at intersections, and was obsessed with watching the rear-view mirror so she would be able to warn him if they were about to get rear ended, etc. She had lived with these symptoms for so long that she had become quite accustomed to simply telling people, “No, I can’t go to the concert/movies/mall because my anxieties have been quite high lately”.  What we discovered after much digging, was that her anxieties kept her vigilant, not only for actual threats to her safety, but imagined ones as well.

Read more

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